It Takes A Toll

Sex Before Marriage

Sex before marriage seems harmless to many today but it leaves unseen scars that can be felt for a lifetime.


God made sexuality a wholesome activity between a husband and wife but it was perverted by Satan when Adam and Eve sinned in the garden. Everything connected with sex today is not wholesome, or as God intended. The devil turns it into a lustful experience if we allow him to. We are warned that unless we control our lustful desires they will come to control us. There is nothing wrong with sex between a husband and a wife. Unfortunately too many today only know lustful self centered sex, which is perverted sex.

We place far too much emphasis on feelings and sexual attraction when picking a mate, instead of getting to know the person and then making our assessment.

God created marriage to be a lifelong union between a man and a woman. When a man and a woman have sex together God causes something to happen in the heart of both of them and they become one. I believe the first person we ever had sex with of our own free will, is recognized by God as our wife or husband. Others, if any, in our life are acts of adultery or fornication that we must repent of.

And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. ~ Matthew 19:4-6

Notice our verses, It is because they are male and female that the male, and not the female, is to leave father and mother to seek a wife. God never intended men and women to be living on their own or living together unmarried. A woman should not be leaving her parents home while she is unmarried if we are to go by Gods' ways. Just as we see today, not following Gods' way affords ample temptation and opportunity to fornicate, and doing so has become so common it is now considered a normal part of life.

There are so many hurting people today because there are so many injured people. They have been ripped apart from their other half and are unaware of what is messing up their life and why they are so unhappy and unfulfilled inside. First of all a saving relationship with Jesus Christ is probably missing in their life and half of themselves is missing as well. We place far too much emphasis on feelings and sexual attraction when picking a mate, instead of getting to know the person and then making our assessment. The number one mistake folks make in this getting to know you stage is to have sexual relations. In Bible days everyone pretty much came from the same or similar background and there were set roles for each of the sexes. Today that is not so and what one expects of the other may be the last thing the other person intends to do or be like. Early sex hides these differences behind a screen of feelings and desire to please, but it never lasts. Sooner or later the differences in expectations and habits are exposed. If we would become friends first, learn to respect one another and pick that person as a marriage partner instead of who made our heart to flutter at first sight, we just might find a true, deep and lasting love.

Although they are largely ignored these days, man, like God, has ordinances saying we are to marry if we live together and want to have children or no children. The Bible tells us to obey every ordinance of man for Christ's sake and for peace. Satan has come along in recent decades and laughed at the practice and taunts people. You don't need a piece of paper to say you are married, he says to them. Much like the serpent said to Eve in the Garden, Yea, hath God said, thereby casting doubt into our hearts and mind so we believe the devil and ignore what God said. We do this to our hurt both here and in eternity if we don’t change the path we walk.

Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. ~ 1 Corinthians 7:2

For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it. ~ Matthew 19:12 tiny cross